Definitions of COMMONLY used/misused hokkien words.

I get this from a blog when I’m searching for the true meaning of ‘tu lan’ as I’m one of the non-hokkien person. It’s worth to share with you people.

Sometimes,non-hokkien people attempt to use hokkien to increase their level of ‘cool-ness’ when they attempt to swear. But more often than not, they fail because they do not know how to put the word into a proper sentence, OR, it doesn’t sound the same when u use it in another language/dialect apart from hokkien. Just like what the Americans did to the original King’s English.

“kan keh”
direct translation – ‘fuck chicken’.
actual meaning – referring to someone who’s cynical and selfish, not willing to take even the slightest risk of anything.
eg: “Leh ma ler ! Ah Seng kau giak kan keh ah ..” [translation: “Your mother ! Ah Seng is damn timid !”]

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“kiong kan ”
direct translation – it actually was a short form for “ki ho lang kan ”, which means, ‘go get yourself fucked by someone’.
actual meaning – an exclamation that was used to vehemently protest against any disagreement or illogical statements.
eg: “Kiong kan lah ! lu sio kong lim peh be hiau si boh ??” [translation : “Kiong kan lah ! You think you can fool me ??”]

“bak moy”
direct translation – ‘pork porridge’
actual meaning – to undergo the complete and permanent cessation of all vital functions; i.e. die
eg: “Eh ! Lu lang cai boh ? Ray Charles bak moy liao !” [translation : “Eh ! Did you guys know ? That Ray Charles is dead !”]

“loo siao”
direct translation – ‘rub sperm’
actual meaning – to riot, to rebel, make trouble or go ballistic. Can be used as adjective, verb or noun.
eg: “That char bor, si peh loo siao, tiam tiam chueh soo …” [translation : “That woman, damn rebellious, always look for trouble..”]

“char siao”
direct translation – ‘fried sperm’
actual meaning – to disturb or to vex someone
eg: “Mai char siao lah !” [translation : “Don’t disturb me !”]

“kuai lan”
direct translation – ’suave dick’
actual meaning – adjective to describe a very cheeky or obnoxious person.
eg: “That si ginna si peh kuai lan.” [translation : “That kid is damn obnoxious.”] “apong sin” direct translation – ‘pancake spirit’ (pancake is also the secondary meaning for vagina)
actual meaning – a person who’s fawning over any females and willing to do anything for them. eg: “Ah Piang kau giak apong sin. Peng eu kio chut, boh eng. Char bor kio chut, eh poey…” [translation : “Ah Piang damn ‘pancake spirit’. When his friends ask him out, always busy. But when girls ask him out, he’ll literally fly out”]
“ciu cheng”
direct translation – ‘hand gun’
actual meaning – an adjective to describe someone that is unskillfully clumsy, delinquent and fucked up. eg: “Si tua pui, kau giak ciu cheng. Chia pun beh hiau park.” [translation : “That fat ass damn fucked up. Don’t even know how to park a car”]

“tu lan” (also known as T.L.)
direct translation – ‘pig’s dick’
real meaning – hatefully dislike or angry; pissed.
eg: “Kua tiok ee eh bin … pun tu lan.” [translation : “It pissed me off even by just a glance of his face.”]

“kam lan”
direct translation – ‘to fellate’
real meaning – an expression added into questions – to denote something ridiculous or defies logical understanding.
eg: “Lu choaa lu eh bor chut lai kam lan aa ??” [translation : “Why the hell do you bring along your wife ??”]

“loh tee”
direct translation – ‘bread’ (derived from the malay word “roti”)
real meaning – an adjective to describe a very slutty, chintzy and promiscuous female being. Highly derogatory.
eg: “Ah Piang eh chat loh si peh loh tee. Goh lui chap pek tau” [translation : “Ah Piang’s girl is a goddamn slut. Five cents for eighteen times”]